American Idol 11: 4/19/12 Results

Well, I went 2 for 3 (ALMOST 3 for 3) with my predictions, but ultimately guessed the wrong cast-off. While Elise probably should have been booted, it ended up being Colton. Perhaps his emo fans went too deep while cutting themselves, damaging their dialing/voting fingers. Or perhaps this is just another example of American Idol scripting a "shocking elimination" the week after using the judges' save. Either way, I really don't care. And neither does Colton, I'll bet. As his sing-out proved, he doesn't need this show. All he needs is THE LAWD.

The Good:

• Uhhh...we kind of got to see Joshua in drag? Of course, it was during the terrible Ford commercial, so that kept me from fully enjoying it.
• I guess I'll put Kris Allen's appearance here. He's just kind of there for me, and his spinning piano made me a bit dizzy, but his song was catchy enough. I also enjoyed Taylor Hicks' intro because A) he clearly makes all the show's bigwigs uncomfortable, B) it's hilarious that he's so excited about playing in Vegas, and C) he just shouted Kris's name before Seacrest had a chance to do his long-winded spiel.
• Colton's gone. Although I'm annoyed that I almost put him in my Bottom 3 and would have gone 3 for 3 if I had, I can't say that I'll miss him.

The Bad:

• The group sing of "Dancing in the Street" was pretty damn horrible, but it's not in the Ugly section because of some humorous bits. Like Phillip. Man, did he look ridiculous. Also, I loved how they threw Jessica out into the audience to try to fool people into thinking that she's connecting with them.
• I'm officially sick of Elise and her bitch faces. Any time she's in the Bottom 3, she wears this expression like, "Oh these dumb voters don't recognize true talent when they see it," but this time around she threw herself a full-on pity party, whining that the judges are harder on her than anyone else, blah blah blah. And then she took a page from BB Chez's book by bringing up how hard she's worked her whole life. Boo hoo. Seriously, Elise, go back to singing six-minute songs in dive bars and get off my TV. And take the majority of the other Idolettes with you.

The Ugly:

• The aforementioned Ford commercial, natch.
• LMFAO's performance is here for lack of a WTF category. OMG, what was that? GTFO. The dancing zebra was pretty funny, but IDK who ever told those guys they could sing, dance, perform or do anything well. And I don't know why they were apologizing for party rocking, when "Party Rock Anthem" is the only good song they have.

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