Saturday, March 14, 2009

Something About a Teenage Whore

I never thought I'd live to see this day.

There is a feud brewing between Miley Cyrus and Radiohead.

Yes. Apparently, Miley was just dying to meet her "rock gods" at the Grammys last month, but when her manager tried to set up a meeting, Thom and the boys were all like, "ewww, no" and then Miley went, "What??" and they said "uh-uh," and then she was like, "OMG, no way!"

At least that's how I imagine it. According to Miley, her manager told the band that she was "obsessed," so it's hard to believe that they would've declined. Who doesn't like partying with obsessive, hyperactive teens?

Kanye West said that the band snubbed him too, so he "sat the f**k down" during their performance. Since there are no real details on that supposed diss, I'm just going to assume that Kanye is making things up so he can have something to YELL ABOUT ON HIS BLOG!!!

Miley, however, was not going to take her snub lying or sitting down. She blathered on to some radio hosts about how mean Radiohead are, and that they made her so sad that she had to leave the Grammys early.

She also promised to RUIN them.

Oh-oh. You'll never work in this country again, Radiohead!

After this threat, Radiohead issued this statement: "When Miley grows up, she'll learn not to have such a sense of entitlement."

You know, part of me kind of feels for Miley. I mean, Thom Yorke could stand to ease up on the tortured genius act a bit. He can't mingle with other people at the Grammys? They're all part of the same dog-and-pony show, so why not loosen up?

However, the bigger part of me that just wants to kick Miley in the ass finds Radiohead's statement hilariously apt.

First of all, how hard can it be to meet people at the Grammys? You're all milling around backstage and stuff. You mean to tell me that you can't just "bump into" someone? Maybe if Miley had played it cool and just tried to wait for an opportunity to say hi instead of having her manager run to them with tales of her undying love, it would've worked out better. If you want to meet someone, do it the old fashioned way! Don't send your lap dog to go sniff them out.

Secondly, I'm sure she does have a sense of entitlement. (Remember her reaction when people got upset about her "slant-eye" picture? It was basically a lot of babbling that amounted to, "Ugh, whatever, like, people are just h8erz.") I guess she thought if she asked her manager to set up a meeting, it would be DONE, because she is Miley Cyrus, after all, and who wouldn't want to meet her? Besides, if they refuse, she will RUIN them! As if she has that power!

Third, I'm not even convinced that she's really that big of a fan. I would be willing to bet that she knows "Creep," "High and Dry," and maybe one or two other tunes. I think the "coolness factor" that being associated with the indie gods could bring was her primary driver.

This all reminds me of the time that Shannen Doherty, at the height of her bitchiness, tried to meet Eddie Vedder, who was completely uninterested. Rather than get her manager to do the dirty work, Shannen tried to pull the "Don't you know who I am?" card with everyone at Eddie's hotel, but got nowhere.

I haven't read this interview with Eddie in a long time, and just reading it again now is cracking me up. It's where I got my post title from. So many good lines. Probably my favorite is, "I know I would just spend the whole time puking if I met her anyway."

And maybe that's the same reason Thom didn't want to meet Miley. Vomiting is no fun.

26 comments:

Chancelucky said...

It just doesn't seem that big a deal to just say "Hi, nice to meet you to someone."

Has Miley done anything in the last 12 months that hasn't been publicly criticized?

Cora said...

Miley has got one mighty BIG head on her little teenage shoulders. She is a train wreck just waiting to happen.

Dr. Monkey said...

Damn it, I thought this post was going to be about Bristol Plain.

SkylersDad said...

Note to Chancelucky: It kinda is a big deal. I tried that with PopEye and she just kept tazing me.

CDP said...

I agree in seeing both sides of this ridonkulous (spelling?) story. On the one hand, yes, it's ridiculous for a 16 year old to send her minions to arrange a meeting. On the other? If you extend the logic in the Radiohead comment about Miley's sense of entitlement, it would appear that they're suggesting that this sense of entitlement is SO massive that she thinks that she should actually get to meet THEM. They're not the damn Royal Family.

Gifted Typist said...

I think it's a big Cyrus in a Yorkepot

Or a Thomas in a Mileypot

Or something Shakespeare said a long time ago.

BeckEye said...

CDP - I agree, but I tend to think that the band's statement was more about Miley's reaction than her actual desire to meet them. You know, she wanted to meet them and she didn't get what she wanted, so she started whining about it to anyone who would listen and then swore to "ruin" them? That doesn't seem like a normal response.

words words words said...

I don't like Radiohead or their whole sanctimonious act. Which means I was totally on Miley's side.

And then she had to go and say she'd "RUIN" them. Oh, sweetie. You just blew it.

Knot said...

Good for Radiohead. Miley Cyrus is obviously the voice of the Millenial trash she represents. Kanye is right there with them. Miley would be nothing without her mulletted dad and Disney marketing machine.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

To set the record straight, it was actually Radiohead's publicist who made the statement about MiCy's sense of entitlement. However, Thom did make this statement on their website, when talking about leaving on their South American tour:
wish us all a safe journey if you still like us and you're not one of those people i have managed to offend by doing nothing

He also said he finished washing his smalls and had almost packed. I wonder if Miley washes her own underwear?

Ian said...

Thanks, Gifted Typist. Now I have the old British pop song "Storm in a Teacup" in my head. "It's a stoooooooooooooorm...in a teacup, brewing up double all those tiny little troubles..." That's gonna be there a while.

Gwen said...

The note! OMG the note! Hahahaha! You kill me.

The Vegetable Assassin said...

I feel kind of bad for her in that what would it take to say hi? It's kind of rude to not even be courteous.

But at the same time, it's the Grammys, she has access to anyone, can't she just go up and say hello in a low key manner? Getting your manager or whoever to set up a "meeting" is just pretentious, almost like being summonsed to her court.

She's probably completely unused to anyone telling her no about anything. It sort of proves she's still a kid by blabbing and calling them names publicly afterwards.

genn6 said...

I agree on both sides, too. Great minds think alike...

sj said...

i agree. the note totally pushed me over the edge with its hilarity.

and miley. oh miley. honey. can we send her to one of those military boot camp kind of things where no one knows she's famous and she has to pee in the woods and survive with only a spoon and a canteen for like, three days? and then disney can film it and make millions MORE off of her.

sounds brilliant to me. someone get me disney on the horn.

Kimizzy said...

Though I have nothing against Miley Cyrus per se (probably because I know absolutely nothing about her except that she's 5 years old and has a One Hit Semi-Wonder father), Radiohead just got a little more awesome to me.

Oh and thanks for the link to Ed's interview. I like that guy so much.

Kimizzy said...

Upon further reflection I thought to myself: It is a sad day in a spoiled child's life when they realize they aren't as adorable to everyone as they thought they were.

Tony Alva said...

No big Miley fan here, but I'm going to say that Yorke is a cunt. Miley's fucking 16, and is expected to act as such. What would have been so hard about saying "hi" and moving her along? Nope, just too cool for school pretentious cunts not wanting to risk having a photo shot with a teeny flash in the pan at a meaningless ego fest. "When Miley grows up, she'll learn not to have such a sense of entitlement."

Entitlement to what and whom? Them? I guess there's a cool factor for us minions that we've got to hit before even we can be graced by Thom Yorke's presence.

All things considered, Miley's an A-1 dingus, but Yorke fired the first salvo so fuck him and fuck Radiohead.

elaine said...

Perhaps the guys of Radiohead were busy or trying to stay relaxed and focused before their performance and didn't want to be interrupted by having to hob-nob with a bunch of egotists. I'm totally on Team Radiohead on this one. Kanye and Miley are both notoriously obnoxious and rude, so I don't blame anyone for not wanting to take time out of their lives to have to indulge them.

Tony Alva - Is this THE Tony Alva? My husband is a huge fan. But if you were getting ready to do a demo or something, he wouldn't be sending his peeps to summon you to come meet him. That being said, we do have a 48' x 50' wooden bowl (that includes decks) covered with skatelite with pool coping and a roof in our backyard, so if you're ever in Memphis . . . ;)

Tony Alva said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Tony Alva said...

Elaine,

No, I'm not 'The' Tony Alva, but if you take a Glance at my avatar you can see that not only did I want to be the real TA when I was a kid, I bore a striking resemblance as a young lad.

That sounds like an impressive piece of plywood landscape you guys have. We build some awesome structures in our day too (mostly from stolen material).

As for Radiohead, I doubt very much your hypothosis was the impetus for their rejection of the teeny bopper. Hey, I dig Radiohead's music too, but that was a dick move, even on Mr. West whom is the doucheland IMHO. Perhaps if they were playing the Garden or something I could understand not wanting to be bothered, but the f8ucking Grammy's? Com'on...

It's okay, my favorite rock stars are douchey to people too.

katrocket said...

Radiohead can be standoffish with the press, but they are generally quite giving and appreciative to their fans. Maybe they just didn't want to reek of Mileystank during the after party?.

Bond said...

i mean how dare they?

this is miley here
don' dey know who da b**ch am?

she be cutting dem up
like little ribbons dey paly her dat way

don' dey know she took out Biggie fer dissing her bad?

LiLu said...

I have more Miley than Radiohead on my ipod.

Which is really, really sad. Does that mean I have to be on her side?

Suze said...

Miley? Why didn't she just tell her dad on them?

Candy's daily Dandy said...

OMG that is priceless....
Miley Cirus-dee-nied!

Love it! I cannot believe she actually thinks she weilds the power to "destroy them"

Are you f-ing kidding me?

 

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