I Think We Could All Use Some Vitamin K

For those of you who thought (and feared!) that our beloved K-Fed might be slipping completely off the radar, never fear. A new commerical is here.

The Sperminator will soon star in one of those "Life Comes at You Fast" ads for Nationwide Insurance, which mocks his inexplicable rise to celeb status, followed by the inevitable plummet back to the trailer park. It's kind of in the same vein as Nationwide's commercial with MC Hammer, but the big difference here is that most of us had already seen Hammer's Behind the Music episode and actually felt bad for the guy. I doubt anyone is shedding any tears for K-Fed. Well, except maybe K-Fed.

I love the standard line the Nationwide ad exec comes up with: "Our partnership with Kevin shows the world that he has a great sense of humor." Or it shows the world that he needs money. Or it shows the world that he has no shame. Or it shows the world that he's a talentless parasite who refuses to disappear from the public eye without a humiliating fight.

What could be next for our dirty white boy? I imagine he'll take up residence in the next Surreal Life house and after that he'll appear as a judge on some lame-ass reality contest. I'm surprised he hasn't already shown up on VH-1's The White Rapper Show. I think those rappers might actually know how to rap, though. Perhaps after sitting through more bad American Idol auditions this year, Simon Cowell will create America's Got NO Talent, thus providing the perfect K-Fed vehicle.