File this under Things I Don't Need to See When I'm Miserably Broke: the heartwarming sight of a toddler driving around in a box that's nicer than my apartment, on a driveway that's probably bigger than my street.According to PopSugar, Britney's son, Sean Preston, has been spotted cruising around the Spears estate in his new kiddie Escalade. Unfortunately for Brit, the passenger seat won't accomodate her giant ass, so she can't put S-Pres on designated driver duty. I suppose she'll just rent him out to Nicole Richie or Kate Moss and use that money to start a college fund. And by "college fund," I mean "liposuction."
I guess a helmet didn't come standard with that model, but at least the kid is safer behind the wheel of his own ride than in Britney's lap. You just never know when a crotchfire might break out.
Comments
I remember way back in the day how excited I was to get the big wheel with the hand break. Dang I could get some speed going down hill with pure pedal power, and then yank on that break for some major spin outs into the yard.
Those were the days.
This will possibly be the only happy moment in the kid's life. Enjoy it while you can, Sean Pressed-on Kid, enjoy it while you can.
Hey you--I corrected an egregious error--come see
Smooch
I'm finally putting a link to your blog up on my site--sorry about the delay!
-- david
and by "college fund" I mean liposuction!!!
Is it just me or is life really really unfair? He's what...three? And he's got his own Escalade? I'm 34 and I've never even owned a used K-Car. Crappy.
But you know, his wonderful memories of that car and the good times he has in it will far outclipse the sight of his mom's panty-less crotch splashed across the internet. Besides, it's not as though he'll ever see them...right?
I suppose we should all just be glad that she didn't have a girl.
Chelene - I can't even afford a skateboard at this point, so don't feel bad.
WP - The happiest moment will probably be when he "accidentally" runs over mom.
Turnbaby - Uh...I really don't want to imagine.
David - True. But I think she's indulging him so she CAN neglect him. You know, with all those great toys, he won't notice that she stayed out at the bar until 5 am every night last week.
Deadspot - They're rare, but do happen.
Barbara - Thanks...and the labia award is mine!!! Yes! Mwaaaahahahahahaha.
Alice - Yay, you've returned to the land of blog. Just in time for an old-fashioned crotch roast.
Layla - Girl, you know it's true.
Lee Ann - I hear it can go from 0 to 5 in under 10 seconds.
Beth - Of course, I think the kid needs to have as much fun as he can now because much of his adult life will be spend on the psychiatrist's couch.
X.Dell - I don't know if they publish those statistics, but you're pretty good at research. I think you should look into it and report back to me. Because I'm lazy.
Karen - My first car was a K-car. I loved it. It was such a piece of shit, but I loved it.
Perhaps not...I don't enjoy Travolta. Ok the VInnie Barbarino days were good but not his revived career.
Your link is finally up. Sorry it takes me 6 months to commit. It takes me at least that long to return a phone call.
BTW isn't S-Fed a little young for that thing? I'm just saying...
I often get a blast from the past when I come here.