Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Fulfilling an Obligation

I've been warned by the Pop Culture Bloggers' Association that my categorization as a "pop culture blog" is in danger due to willful disregard on my part. Fine. The PCBA wins.

Here is famous-for-nothing, bubble-butt celebutard Kim Kardashian. ---->

Now, can anyone give me one good reason why I should give a good rat's ass about this broad? And, by the way, the following are unacceptable answers:

1. She's rich.
2. She has a sex tape.
3. Bruce Jenner is her stepfather. (Let's face it - once upon a time the world may have cared about Bruce Jenner when he was an Olympic hero, but future generations will now only remember him as "the creepy old dude" from that Kardashian show on E! Seriously, he looks like he could be the newest Dick Tracy character, "Tightface.")

Suddenly, Kim Kardashian is everywhere, and I have no idea where she came from. I suspect, though, that someone got Paris Hilton wet and Kim grew from one of the little fur balls that popped out of her. Thank God they never eat after midnight. Or noon, even.

27 comments:

LoraLoo said...

So basically she had the Paris Hilton fast-track to fame, just being a rich girl... I have never seen the Kardashian show on MTV (I feel like I lose IQ points every time I change the channel to MTV anymore).

Les Becker said...

Rich and having a famous relative(s). They should be forced to donate half their allowance to a charity to buy their way into our television sets. I want to ask these people, "What are you FOR, really?"

Molie said...

I don't think there are any reasons why anyone should care for her or her show excepting of course those with big ass or breast fetishes.

deadspot said...

Holy crap! The mummified dude is Bruce Jenner?

pistols at dawn said...

Never underestimate the potential of a sex tape.

SkylersDad said...

Blow up tits and an ass 3 axe handles wide... What am I missing here?

Coaster Punchman said...

Is it a sign I'm getting old that I never even hear about these "personalities" of questionable value to the world?

Moxie said...

I am annoyed by her, too, but I admit to thinking she's prettier than Paris Hilton. Sometimes Paris looks like 10 miles of bad road.

And Tightface is right. The scariest thing about living in LA/Orange County is the moments when you come face-to-face with a plastic surgery addict. (This was accurately depicted on last week's episode of Nip/Tuck.)

Sidenote: Last weekend in Orange Co. I saw a woman who was probably around 58 with bleached blonde hair, collagen-filled lips, and silicone knockers. To top it off she was baring her stomach and wearing mega-tight jeans. Always interesting to see Plastics in their natural habitat - the mall.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

I've never even heard of this one. You are obviously fulfilling a very important role here. I would hate to lose my cool kid status.

Bluez said...

Forget Jenner's step daughter, his real son Brody on "The Hills" is so worth watching just to look at... I wonder is Bruce gets a cut of any of his kids cashola...

and I hope Brody ages better than his father did, Bruce looks frightened.

X. Dell said...

You know, I've seen a lot of press about this person, most of it having to do with a sex tape that she made. But I've never seen or heard about her in any other context.

The only thing I thought was that she might be related to the late Robert Kardashian. Otherwise, why would a sex tape of her be such a big deal, if not a relative of the famous?

Manx said...

Whenever I see her commercials, I think it's a spin off Star Trek show called "Keeping Up with the Cardasians".

Suze said...

Celebrity (and I use that term loosely) seem to be popping up all over.

Blowing Shit Up With Gas said...

"why I should give a good rat's ass about this broad?"

Because she's famous and has a stupid look on her face. ?

BTW, I just watched Gremlins the other nght.

Dale said...

The only place I've seen her is on the E! Channel on "The Soup". I didn't know the Jenner connection, he and Kenny Rogers should hit the road together with their roasted faces.

Barbara (aka Layla) said...

Great comments...I have never even heard of this chick till now (Im not as cool as you and don't keep up well with these things) but I have already heard more than I want!

I think I saw the same woman in OC as your friend Moxie ...

Beth said...

I tried watching the show — gotta support my fellow assed ladies — but it's such a waste of life. I was around for Bruce's glory — he was a hero — but his face freaks me out.

anandamide said...

funny, i was wondering the same thing

Artful Dodger said...

Huh?? Who's that? Never heard of her. MTV still exists?

Writeprocrastinator said...

A "Gremlins" and a Dick Tracy reference, absolutely brilliant!

Grant Miller said...

I only know who she is because of Howard Stern.

Distributorcap said...

doesnt bruce jenner have a really bad nose and around 32 kids?

BeckEye said...

Lora - The show is on E!, where the stars aren't as bright and the train wrecks aren't as grisly as on MTV.

Les - The dumb socialite's idea of "giving to charity" is having a drunken one-nighter with a non-famous person.

Molie - So, excepting 90% of all straight men?

Deadspot - Yep. Creepy, eh?

Pistols - Well, sex tapes are like STDs and DUIs to these girls by now. They've all had at least one.

Skyler's Dad - You, sir, are a gentleman and a poet. :)

CP - No, it's a sign that you're much better at tuning out assholes than I am.

Moxie - Yeah, you don't have to look very far to find someone prettier than Paris Hilton. I'm convinced that she's part anteater.

Barbara - I didn't want the Pop Culture Gods to think I didn't know she existed. I know, I just don't care.

Bluez - Yeah, Brody Jenner is pretty hot. Let's just hope he doesn't turn out like dear old dad in about 30-40 years. Oh, and if I start watching "The Hills," please throw me off of one.

X.Dell - She's Robert Kardashian's daughter, but her "celebrity" probably was created by her friendship with Paris Hilton and, obviously, the sex tape.

Manx - I'm going to assume that Cardasians were some alien race that Kirk and crew had to fight. If they're not Klingons, I have no idea.

Suze - It's pathetic that people are just famous for having money now. These are this generation's role models. Rich, skinny whores who drink and drive. I weep for the future.

BSUWG - By that reasoning, I should care about a lot more people than I do.

Dale - Kenny Rogers' new head scares the beejeezuz out of me.

Layla - If you can continue on without hearing about her, you are a lucky woman. Don't feel you're missing anything!

Beth - Stick with J. Lo and Beyonce if you wanna support junk in the trunk. At least they're providing the world with some type of entertainment.

Anandamide - No one's given either of us a good reason to care yet, right?

Dodger - You're lucky. And yes, MTV still exists, although what the M stands for is still up for debate.

WP - I aim to please.

Grant - I don't listen to Howard Stern anymore since I don't get Sirius or XM...whatever he's on. But I'm not surprised that he would bow down to this broad.

Distributorcap - Yes to the first, and I'm not sure to the second.

cube said...

Until now, I had only heard the name & had assumed she was the daughter of OJ's Armenian lawyer friend. You know, the guy who walked off with the bag holding the bloody clothes.

Bruce Jenner is married to her mom?
Ewwww.

Leonesse said...

Is it supposed to be Pop Culture or has this now changed into Smut Culture? I figured quite some time ago that she was going to be the next 'made' celebuskank not long after PHilton slithered into celebrityhood.

I wonder how much they paid publicit

Leonesse said...

publicists!!! oops.

I wonder how much they paid publicists to make this happen?

Johnny Yen said...

It's funny-- I'd never made the connection with the name.

How in the hell can you have that much money and be that uninteresting? What happened to the days of flamboyant, drunken rich people with inspired antics?

 

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