The Most Shocking News Since Clay Aiken Announced His "Theatricality"

Paula Abdul is addicted to painkillers! For realz! (I say "is" instead of "was" because, even though she claims to have kicked her habit, A) she claimed for years that she never did drugs, and B) drug addicts are filthy liars.)

And the truth shall set P-Ab free. Free from what, I'm not sure. Certainly not ridicule. Especially not mine.

If I'm being honest, this news didn't exactly have me jumping out of my chair. Still, I'm glad Paula finally fessed up. It's about time she started telling the truth.

Of course, it's also about time for her to start promoting the new album no one asked or wanted her to record. But I'm sure the two things have nothing to do with each other.

Comments

Gifted Typist said…
Well that explains a lot. Did I heard Cowell on Ellen tonight saying Kara's not coming back next year. And Cowell may not be back either.

Just had a sneak preview of Glambert absolutely hammering that Zep classic. Can't wait for your review.
Lady Jane said…
Watching AI and reading you!! Must check out about Paula!!!
Falwless said…
That pic is fantastic.
Gifted Typist said…
Hmm, I guess it was Ellen saying Kara won't be back and Simon saying everyone is back.

I hope they dump kara, I'm agreeing with you on her
Gwen said…
Well that explains everything. Thanks for the scoop.
Last time I'm sending her to the drugstore for me!
Cormac Brown said…
That title is an apt metaphor, because I believe her admission was a pre-emptive strike against somebody outing her addiction. I wouldn't be surprised if there was some footage from her reality show confirming her pill popping, that should've stayed on the cutting room floor, but didn't.