Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Caption Crotch-test Contest #30

Full-length when she left the house, Lohan laughs when she realizes her jeans have become the latest victim of the sucking, insatiable black hole between her legs.

Just the third entry in this week's contest, I knew McGone's was the winner the minute I laid eyes on it...and nearly vomited on it in a mix of revulsion, hysteria, and admiration. I think this might be one of my favorite captions of all time because it's so clever. Now, that's what I call thinking outside the box! (No pun intended. Okay, that's a lie. If there's a pun to be made, it's always intended.)

The only thing that angers me (in more ways than one) is that McGone no longer has a blog. So, Mr. McFieryloins, I trust that you will either post this badge on your Facebook wall or make it into a decal and iron it across the seat of your favorite pair of sweatpants. (Don't forget to get rid of the white space, because that will look stupid. Unless your sweatpants are white. Which they probably shouldn't be.)



And the runner up (yep, only one this month) is...

Despite the disappointing turnout, Lindsay still tried to enjoy herself at the first annual Herpes Pride Parade. - Jon

Oooh, your crotchfire almost continue to burn for two months straight, Jon, but McGone, uh, blew it out.

30 comments:

The Vegetable Assassin said...

She's all, "Hang up now, bitch or I'll cut you with this tiny carving knife!"

It's amazing after all this time I still can't do effing captions. :(

SkylersDad said...

Lilo: I'm letting all my followers know that these vibrating panties are the BEST FUCKING THING EVER!!

Pootie: I'm on hold with the clinic still trying to get your test results...

McGone said...

Full-length when she left the house, Lohan laughs when she realizes her jeans have become the latest victim of the sucking, insatiable black hole between her legs.

Bond said...

"I dialed his number and then hung up and he is still asking 'who's there' and they call me dumb as a stone!"

or

"Man am I glad Perez is onto Tila and is forgetting I exist"

katrocket said...

Pootie: "Um, hello? Is your refrigerator running?"

Lindsay: "hahahaha! Good one!"

The Vegetable Assassin said...

Hahaha, McGone...

I wouldn't want to be the dude or dudette who had to pull those out.

The Vegetable Assassin said...

How about the dude is on the phone saying, "Hello? Yeah, can you send someone, she thinks she's Stevie Wonder again!"

carissajaded said...

I dunno what they're saying but that dude clearly just gave Lilo a wedgie...

Barbara Bruederlin said...

I don't even try anymore. I can't compete against this ravenous pack of caption inventors. But god damn I sure like reading them!

Candy's daily Dandy said...

"Fuckin morons. They didn't even see me lift this here keychain."

HAHAHA@ Veg Assassin's last one.

Scope said...

He said "Wanna bone?" and I laughed back, "I am a bone!"

Rabbit said...

Awww... Don't cry, Poopie! I gots some more crack rock right here unda my tittay. It'll be aight...

The Lady Who Doesn't Lunch: said...

Hurry Pootie Pie! Get a cab or I'm going to be late for my Coyote Ugly audition! Quick - fluff my fringe!

OR

Great they replayed Parent Trap on TBS and the royalties just hit my checking account - let's hurry over to Kitson and buy the rest of my pants.

(my first attempt at the caption contest - fingers crossed...)

words...words...words... said...

Lindsay: Hahahahaha! You stole your mother's crocheted plant hanger and wore it as a hat!

Pootie: No, really. Does it make me look fierce?

words...words...words... said...

Pootie: Why did you leave those pockets hanging out instead of cutting them off?

Lindsay: I need them to hold my tits.

Jon said...

"Hello, 911? Better send a car over here quickly. Lindsay keeps trying to change the channel.

You know who this is, dammit!! It's Pootie!"

Jon said...

(The above caption was brought to you by "Where's a Runaway Bus When You Need One" Magazine.)

Penny said...

She creeps me out. Seriously.
I'm not witty enough to come up with a caption. I just wanted to inform you that she creeps me out :)

red said...

"Haha. Good one paparazzi."

That's seriously all I got. God, I suck at life.

Angell said...

LiLo: Ok, so should we name our first born Prius or how about Jaguar? Pootie - LISTE TO ME.

Pootie: Hold on sugar. Um, yeah, about that vasectomy?


Yeah I suck at this too. Which is why I never enter - just laugh.

words...words...words... said...

Jon, nice A.C. reference!

Mr. Condescending said...

katrockets was hilarious!p

Tootsie said...

Wahahaha I called Rent-A-Shadow and they sent me Pootie!

Cora said...

BREAKING NEWS: Sycophant extraordinaire Pootie steals Lilo's top secret clothing designs while Lilo wrestles with disfiguring mouth-breathing ailment. And fails.

Cora said...

Lilo: "Hey, Pootie pie, watch this! I can laugh like Spongebob! AYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYA!!!!!"

Pootie: "OMG, Linds, IDK, ur like sooooo sexy n stuff."

Jon said...

Despite the disappointing turnout, Lindsay still tried to enjoy herself at the first annual Herpes Pride Parade.

McGone said...

Holy crap, I'm the winner! I'm thinking about getting it tattooed on my forehead!

And I'm thinking about seeking therapy after the whole "McGone blew out Jon's crotchfire" thing!

LiLu said...

*throws away white sweatpants*

*pulls them back out of the trash and wears them anyway, because who are you to tell me my pizza stains are ugly*

words...words...words... said...

Wow, it's true. Repeating IS harder than winning the first championship. I was sure that my tits caption was a runner up. Congrats to McGone...nobody else had a prayer!

Bond said...

Congrats to the winners

my word verification

pophip

hehehehehe

 

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