Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Mr. Romance, Thy Name is Howard

Howard Stern, who has been divorced from long-time (and long-suffering) wife, Alison for about 7 years, has always maintained that he would never tie the knot again. He must have tacked on an Unless-I-Snag-A-Really-Hot-Younger-Model clause to that declaration, because he just popped the question to his girlfriend of 5 years, Beth Ostrosky.

Howard decided to propose on Valentine's Day Eve instead of the actual holiday, just narrowly avoiding a trip to Cliche City. Of course, the rest of his proposal was certainly anything but traditional, making Beth strip down to nothing before even giving her the ring. Then he said the words that would make any gal's heart melt, "I love you. You're everything to me. This is so gay...I'm asking you to spend the rest of your life with me."

The lameness of that proposal aside, I wish Howard and Beth luck. I was amazed that his first marriage lasted so long, and even though he's made a living from being a giant pig, he actually always seemed like a decent guy who's a one-woman man and doesn't screw around. And Beth is a Pittsburgh girl, so if anyone can keep him in line, she can.

Hmm, so Howard Stern can find two wives and I can't even seem to find one date in the biggest city in the country. Happy Valentine's Day to me! I'm not bitter. Just bored. These fake Hallmark holidays make me cringe.

8 comments:

Writeprocrastinator said...

So Beth is from Pittsburgh? Nothing will keep a man in line more than a woman who knows how to temper and use steel.

I'll give the marriage five years, probably longer. She definitely knows what she was getting into.

Edge said...

I don't ask what she sees in him. I do, his money. Besides you look over his shoulder or do the reverse cowgirl during sex.

~Jef

Les Becker said...

Oh, ewww. There's just no other word that comes to mind. Other than, uck, maybe.

Turnbaby said...

Yeah--he raises my "ick" factor to a new level.

Sugar--I once told my getting- married- for- the- third-when-I-had-not-been-married-even-once-bitch-of-a-sister that she had to STOP--she was using mine up!!

It's not really that way it turned out--I got married at 36 and proved them all wrong

Bond said...

I am a big HS fan.. always have been since he came to NYC and even appeared on a PBS show in Boston when he made his way there in the mid-90's....
He was faithful to Allison the entire time and they fell out of love...
Even when he was single he never "whored around"
The people who hate him the most are the people who have only read negativce things about him and have never truly listened to him

End of rant

David Amulet said...

I have so little interest in Howard Stern's personal life it doesn't even create brain waves. But I hope he's happy--that much I can say to anyone.

But Edge has it right ... he's a catch b/c of his huge satellite radio $$$ if nothing else.

-- david

JR's Thumbprints said...

You're kidding right? Howard Stern? Mr. Romance? There's plenty of sack chasers out there. All you need is a bag of money.

Lee Ann said...

Another Howard Stern in the news!!!!

 

Who Does This Broad Think She Is?

My photo
I am a winsome muse who was sent to Earth to inspire an artist to turn a vacant building into the world's coolest disco roller rink. We fell in love along the way, and I foolishly gave up my immortality. When the disco craze ended and all the roller rinks were shut down, that lazy bum wouldn't get a job. We broke up and I was stuck on Earth with nothing to do and no one to inspire. So, now I write a blog.

What Do Others Think of BeckEye?

"You're like an idiot savant of terrible garbage entertainment." - Falwless

"You're my hero." - Candy

"Get yourself a life. Better yet.....eff off." - Ann Onymous

"There's no one like you." - Klaus Meine