Caption Crotch-test Contest #5

Mattel's new "G.I. Ho"



And there's your winner this month, kids, provided by the sassy Suzel of Suzel's Sass! (Say that five times fast!) She followed BeckEye's golden rule: When in doubt, pun.

Congratulations, Soldier Sass! Your privates have just been promoted. Wear this badge with honor. You're one of the few, the proud, the Firecrotches.

Comments

Travis Cody said…
I don't think I've played this game yet.

How about...

"Hmmmmm...I wonder what these little yellow tabs do?"

Or...

"Now really! Can't anyone find me the right nametag?"

Or...

"Watch this! No, come one! Watch! I can make my nipple stand up just by staring at it."
I can make the left one move up and down, PLUS I can wiggle my ears.
Splotchy said…
"It's true, the camouflage hides the herpes!"
"Goddamn, Hilton - these ta-tas are four star-worthy. They'd make Lt. Dan stand at attention!"
"This air freshner around my neck ain't working so good. I can tell I'm less than fresh again."
Brent McKee said…
Is it true that Paris Hilton has had lovers from the Army and Navy but has never even kissed a Marine? It's true, she's rotten to the Corps. (Very very old joke, modified to fit the subject.)
SkylersDad said…
Camouflage doesn't work at all! I can still see the boys.
Mme.G said…
"I call this costume 'Your Patriotic Duty'...because every soldier wants to do it!"
Anonymous said…
Mattel's new "G.I. Ho"
Anonymous said…
How do I get the used condom out of my bra while I'm in public?

~Jef
deadspot said…
"Get a load of these MRE's!"
Cup said…
"Talk about your armed forces."
"What do you mean I have the rank on upside down? It looks fine from here..." or "Lookie here -- boobs!" or "Stealth Bomber."

I suck at this game.
I gots nothing, though I vote for the G.I. Ho caption...

seriously though, that trinket around her neck could bloody buy world peace.
Leonesse said…
GI's, Tramps & Thieves
We'd hear it from the people of the town
They'd call me GI's, tramps, and thieves
But every night all the men would come around
And lay their money down
Dale said…
Come up and see me sometime.
Tootsie said…
"Mosquito bite me!"
cube said…
Yeah, I like GI Ho too.

This isn't a caption, but at first I thought Paris had a second head on her shoulders. A really creepy looking one at that.
david santos said…
My friend, Please!

Send an email to the Brazil embassj your country and repor the injustice that the brazilian courts are making with this girl
Release on Flavia’s accident and status of the process.

The resignation is to stop the evolution. (David Santos in times without end)

Thank you
"Stanley Steamer? 'Tough on dirt, gentle on carpet? Hah, I have no carpet."
Sans Pantaloons said…
The hole of Paris prepares for invasion.
LoraLoo said…
I do love the "G.I. Ho"
Distributorcap said…
Jail does wonder for growth doesnt it?
Dammit, I was going to post something about Soldier Slut Barbie, but suzel's sass beat me to it. Mine was:

Teach your daughter patriotism and hotness by giving her the all new Soldier Tramp Barbie! Accessories include:

--AK-47
--beer goggles
--pregnancy test
--bottle of pennicillin
Bar L. said…
ha. I can never compete with your readers witty comments. Good ones.
anandamide said…
(sound of wind)
Artful Dodger said…
This uniform is Dick Cheney approved.
"...and so, when the record producer told me to 'sing from my diaphragm?' I said, 'um, no, but I'll bet I'll be able to hum a few bars from down there."
Joe said…
Oh...my tits in camo look HAWT...
Anonymous said…
Yeah, yeah, yeah!! The awards ceremony will be televised tonight on my blog. Bring your tissues! Thank you BeckEye!!
I missed this month..damn
Yeah, I sat this one out... couldn't think of anything better than the winner!
I'm standing at attention already... :^)