The auditions just keep coming and I'm still underwhelmed. No one exactly burned down Atlanta tonight.
The show started off on a sour note when the judges all seemed to like Mr. Glass (I've stopped bothering to write down their names) even though he hacked his way through a delightful Queen song. If you're gonna take on something as campy as "Don't Stop Me Now," you need to have at least 1/8 of the stage presence as Freddie Mercury, which this guy did not. I can't believe the judges put him through. Paula must be sharing her crazy pills.
The requisite Lifetime moment was brought to us by Curly Tendrils, who didn't let the death of her father just two days prior stop her from auditioning. I understand drive and ambition and all that "I wanna make Daddy proud" stuff, but I can't imagine still going through with something like this so soon after such a loss. But, whatever. I'm not judging her. I will judge her voice though - it was just average. I thought it "cracked" too much, but it was obvious that that was the effect she was going for. And there was no way she wouldn't make it through after revealing her personal tragedy.
Pageant Princess skipped in and informed Simon that she was going to prove to him that pageant girls can really sing. She proved it, but she also proved that pageant girls truly are insufferable. After she forced hugs on all of the judges and bounded out of the room, my love for Simon grew as he grumbled, "She is possibly the most annoying person I have ever seen. I did not want her to sing well." Oh, when will Simon give Paula the heave-ho and make me his right-hand girl? We would make such beautiful music and mockery together.
Giving up valuable hackey-sack time to audition was Emo Sk8r Boi, who yelled his way through a Finger 11 song and tried to be a "smart-ahhssss" when Simon told him he gave a "bedroom audition." The kid blew many opportunities to be funny, and Simon put him in his place. Outside the doors.
Goth Nurse was much more enjoyable, and I'm betting that she'll make it through to the Top 12 because every season needs the token "rocker chick." Girl can belt. Paula said she was the female Chris Daughtry, but she clearly has more hair and less eyeliner.
Hobo Joe closed the show out with an original song that he wrote during his down time, which is, apparently, every day since he lives in his car and doesn't seem to have a job. I couldn't stop wondering how the hell he affords car insurance. Then he sang and I couldn't stop wondering where he picked up the British accent growing up in Tennessee. Everyone noticed it, and of course Simon loved that Hobo wanted to emulate a Brit. He made it through to Hollywood, where he'll fit right in with all the other homeless musicians. He didn't have a bad voice, but I think he was trying too hard and I didn't dig the vibrato. He sounded like Robbie Williams in a blender. Hmmm...now there's a pleasant thought.
The show started off on a sour note when the judges all seemed to like Mr. Glass (I've stopped bothering to write down their names) even though he hacked his way through a delightful Queen song. If you're gonna take on something as campy as "Don't Stop Me Now," you need to have at least 1/8 of the stage presence as Freddie Mercury, which this guy did not. I can't believe the judges put him through. Paula must be sharing her crazy pills.
The requisite Lifetime moment was brought to us by Curly Tendrils, who didn't let the death of her father just two days prior stop her from auditioning. I understand drive and ambition and all that "I wanna make Daddy proud" stuff, but I can't imagine still going through with something like this so soon after such a loss. But, whatever. I'm not judging her. I will judge her voice though - it was just average. I thought it "cracked" too much, but it was obvious that that was the effect she was going for. And there was no way she wouldn't make it through after revealing her personal tragedy.
Pageant Princess skipped in and informed Simon that she was going to prove to him that pageant girls can really sing. She proved it, but she also proved that pageant girls truly are insufferable. After she forced hugs on all of the judges and bounded out of the room, my love for Simon grew as he grumbled, "She is possibly the most annoying person I have ever seen. I did not want her to sing well." Oh, when will Simon give Paula the heave-ho and make me his right-hand girl? We would make such beautiful music and mockery together.
Giving up valuable hackey-sack time to audition was Emo Sk8r Boi, who yelled his way through a Finger 11 song and tried to be a "smart-ahhssss" when Simon told him he gave a "bedroom audition." The kid blew many opportunities to be funny, and Simon put him in his place. Outside the doors.
Goth Nurse was much more enjoyable, and I'm betting that she'll make it through to the Top 12 because every season needs the token "rocker chick." Girl can belt. Paula said she was the female Chris Daughtry, but she clearly has more hair and less eyeliner.
Hobo Joe closed the show out with an original song that he wrote during his down time, which is, apparently, every day since he lives in his car and doesn't seem to have a job. I couldn't stop wondering how the hell he affords car insurance. Then he sang and I couldn't stop wondering where he picked up the British accent growing up in Tennessee. Everyone noticed it, and of course Simon loved that Hobo wanted to emulate a Brit. He made it through to Hollywood, where he'll fit right in with all the other homeless musicians. He didn't have a bad voice, but I think he was trying too hard and I didn't dig the vibrato. He sounded like Robbie Williams in a blender. Hmmm...now there's a pleasant thought.
Comments
And you are correct, if you're going to cover an upbeat Queen song...DON'T. You will never be the vibrant, crazy, falsetto showman Freddie was, as you pointed out. The dude last night doesn't sound like he was much of a Mr. Fahrenheit to me! :)
I think that Hobo Joe character looks mildly retarded.
Metal Mark - Yeah, you're much better off just reading my recaps! :)
Pistols - Twice a week. When I'm bored though, I just make up recaps when shows don't really exist.
Genn6 - Yeah, I like her too. Although I'd be afraid to let her take my blood.
Barbara - She probably just rips your veins open with her nails.
Bond - You might be a redneck if you don't have car insurance.
Dale - We can be brain dead together.
Dale - And thanks.
Bubs - I do what I can.