Sunday, November 08, 2009

Caption Crotch-test Contest #28

It feeds itself, then it rubs the lotion all over its body.

I don't know, that caption is just the one that made me laugh the most. Candy must know that I can't resist the juxtaposition of unrelated pop culture references, and for that, I reward her with a flaming crotch. Congrats, Candy! I hope your first time isn't too uncomfortable.

I guess this really wasn't a highly captionable picture, so I tip my hat to all of you who made a valiant effort. But there is only one runner-up this month, 徵信, who came from out of nowhere with this hilarious gem:
"花蓮民宿, 花蓮民宿, 花蓮民宿, 花蓮民宿, 花蓮民宿, 花蓮民宿, 徵信, 徵信, 徵信, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信社, 徵信社, 徵信社, 徵信公司, 徵信公司, 徵信公司, 徵信公司, 徵信, 徵信, 徵信, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信社, 徵信社, 徵信社, 離婚, 離婚, 離婚, 離婚, 尋人, 尋人, 尋人, 尋人, 徵信, 徵信, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信社, 徵信社, 離婚, 離婚, 離婚, 尋人, 尋人, 尋人, 徵信, 徵信, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信社, 徵信社, 尋人, 尋人, 尋人, 徵信, 徵信, 徵信, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信社, 徵信社, 徵信社, 感情挽回, 感情挽回."

The only reason that didn't take top honors is because a) the joke got a bit repetitive, and b) calling a Hualian person a "firecrotch" is a sign of much disrespect, and an offense that is punishable by death. Makes me wonder why 徵信 even bothered to enter the contest.

24 comments:

Some Guy said...

"This is what it's all about. A beautiful afternoon in Los Angeles spent enjoying a delicious salad with friends. I love life!"

Scope said...

"I just paid $50 for a salad that I'm just going to purge in the bathroom on the way out. I should have gone to Wendy's and saved myself $45."

Tennyson ee Hemingway said...

Oh my God, is that Madonna over there? If I pretend to eat this, will she at least not try to kiss me?

words...words...words... said...

"Don't give me that look, young lady. You can't have your pills until you finish your microgreens!"

SkylersDad said...

I thought that drinking wine through a straw would distract the paparazzi from the fact I am actually eating.

OgunSensei said...

Geez...this salad tastes worse than Samantha Ronson's ass.

McGone said...

After years of practice, Lindsay had mastered the art of vomiting her food to such a precise manner that she was able to catch it with a fork, ninja-like.

Cormac Brown said...

Wait, am I supposed to use put my finger down my throat, or this fork?

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Having found the rewind button on her camcorder, LiLo spent the rest of the afternoon happily watching herself uneat.

Bond said...

"OK, now was this the binge or purge part...I get so confused"


And then I read the other answers and it looks like many of us are on the same path

how about

"Zoom goes the airplane and the hanger door opens and in zooms the airplane...yeah that is how it goes"

Tootsie said...

This diet is wearing me thin.

Gwen said...

My nutritionist said that eating salad was like giving a rim job. Or did she say tossing salad? I don't know. I'm so hungry I confuse easily.

Jon said...

What?? You've never seen a fork go limp before?

徵信 said...

花蓮民宿 , 花蓮民宿 , 花蓮民宿 , 花蓮民宿 , 花蓮民宿 , 花蓮民宿 , 徵信 , 徵信 , 徵信 , 徵信 , 徵信社 , 徵信社 , 徵信社 , 徵信社 , 徵信公司 , 徵信公司 , 徵信公司 , 徵信公司 , 徵信 , 徵信 , 徵信 , 徵信 , 徵信社 , 徵信社 , 徵信社 , 徵信社 , 離婚 , 離婚 , 離婚 , 離婚 , 尋人 , 尋人 , 尋人 , 尋人 , 徵信 , 徵信 , 徵信 , 徵信社 , 徵信社 , 徵信社 , 離婚 , 離婚 , 離婚 , 尋人 , 尋人 , 尋人 , 徵信 , 徵信 , 徵信 , 徵信社 , 徵信社 , 徵信社 , 尋人 , 尋人 , 尋人 , 徵信 , 徵信 , 徵信 , 徵信 , 徵信社 , 徵信社 , 徵信社 , 徵信社 , 感情挽回 , 感情挽回

words...words...words... said...

I can't compete with that guy.

katrocket said...

"NOM NOM NOM NOM slurp NOM NOM NOM."

Candy's daily Dandy said...

"it feeds itself, then it rubs the lotion all over it's body."

Doc said...

"What? I always have a salad after an all night bender!"

"I ordered Ranch dressing not yak jizz! What kind of place is this?"

"Maybe this salad will relieve my constipation. Lord, I hope so. I ain't crapped in a month."

"At these prices, you'd think they could throw a little cannibis in the salad. The cheap bastards!"

"What am I? A rabbit? Take this shit back and bring me a rare steak, a bottle of scotch, two joints, a cuban cigar, and for dessert I'll have the oxycotin choclate moussse and the Haitian waiter with the cute ass! Today I start my Babe Ruth diet!"

Doc

Mathdude said...

As usual, I got nothing. Your Caption Contest is like my Krytonite. It renders me unfunny and causes me to only think of the straight lines.

Candy's daily Dandy said...

*sniff* I'm so honored....
Thanks Becks..

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Well done, Candy! ALthough that runner up had me peeing in my pants a little.

Suze said...

I remember when I was Fire Crotch of the Year. sniffle...sniffle....Memories

Bond said...

that is funny

words...words...words... said...

Well done, Candy! I like your caption but I hope I never have to see it in action.

 

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