Wednesday, May 12, 2010

American Idol 9: 5/12/10 Results

So, folks, this recap is going to have to be the PS version tonight. I need to get to bed. I feel like I'm coming down with something and I'm praying to Danny Gokey's crazy church that it's not strep. Apparently, it's gotten to the point where American Idol is actually making me physically ill.

[In the style of La Roux] This time baby, I'll do bulllllletttt points!

Results

  • All the families got to sit on the stage couches while the Final 4 awaited their results in the uncomfortable stools.
  • Casey was named safe first. Of course he was, because he was my pick to go home! I immediately thought perhaps they were setting up the season's big "shocker," either turning Crystal into Melinder Doolittle or Lee into Daughtry. (It should be noted that Lee will turn into Daughtry eventually. But with hair.)
  • Lee would not be Daughtried tonight. He was named safe second, leaving Crystal and Mike in the Bottom 2. If Mike's family's expressions could have made a sound, it would have been, "Awwwwww shiiiiiit."
  • No crazy shenanigans with Crystal. Mike was booted.
  • Why did Mike choose to go out on the Free Willy song? Haven't the contestants generally been picking their most well-received songs as their last hurrahs?
Musical Guests
  • Fantasia sang her new song "Bittersweet." This time, unfortunately, she did not turn in a performance worthy of this famous reaction. Other things I noticed (because I certainly wasn't paying attention to the song):
    • 'Tasia was obviously torn between getting the Rihanna or the Bieber cut, and settled for a weird combination of both.
    • One of her backup singers must not have shown because there appeared to be a 6th grade art teacher among the backing trio.
  • Daughtry was Daughtry. Although they wished they were Bon Jovi.
  • Bon Jovi did their new song, "Superman Tonight." OK, look. I still like Bon Jovi. All you haterz can go to hell.
    • Richie Sambora finally cut his hair. Sadly, it was with a weed whacker.
    • Jon Bon...well, what can I say? That hair. That butt. Those teeth. My God, THOSE TEETH. Aging that well should really be illegal.
Other Observations
  • That "movie trailer" opening was one of the dumbest intros yet. If this season of AI were really a movie, I definitely wouldn't go see it. Maybe I'd Netflix it. I'd put it in my queue right behind the entire Leprechaun franchise.
  • I swear I saw Stewart Copeland in the audience. Was I imagining that? Or was it his doppelgänger?
  • I greatly appreciated the well-placed "Gosh"es during the video package of the past winners visiting their hometowns.
  • Casey was totally stoned. Like, beyond Jason Castro stoned.
  • Jon Bon Jovi's teeth deserve another mention.
  • This might have been the first show in history that didn't run over or right up to the last minute. When they started running Mike's farewell package, there were still 5 minutes left. And when he was done singing, there were still 2 minutes left. So, we got to see lots of hugs and then Ryan just talked super slowly for a little bit.
  • Shouldn't Mike's wife have put some earplugs or headphones on that baby?
So, what's on tap for next week? I'm guessing it's judges' choice/personal choice for each of the Final 3. I wonder if Kara will choose Casey's song, and if it will be that country classic, "Older Women?"


Find more Idol news and recaps at SirLinksaLot.

10 comments:

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

I thought the guy from Chicago with the short hair should have went home because his performance of Seal was very "karaoke" like they said, and he did flub some notes. As always, Big Mike's farewell song was right on the money because all the pressure is off and they are emotional, so they always do a bang up job once they're eliminated.

The Scott Family said...

You are hilarious! I love your blog. I can't stop reading it. I stumbled upon it when I too was curious about whether or not that was Stewart Copeland in the AI audience. I was just so happy to see that anyone these days actually knows who he is and love your commentary on the show. My husband loves that you had the Oran Juice Jones video posted. And now I see your Grease reference above my comment. So, I just wanted to say thank you for the entertainment. (Kate, mom of 2, Torrance CA)

Steve said...

I am going nuts here. Every commentary and blog I have read tonight has placed Crystal in the bottom, with Mike. People must not be paying attention to the Ryan (don't get me wrong - I understand it is sometimes hard to listen to him)...but he said before every person mentioned that this is in random order...or no specific order. I know I am not alone here...but I am just trying to be fair to Crystal. There was no bottom "2" tonight.

BeckEye said...

Dr. Ken - Well, that was Lee, and he's one of the judges' favorites, so it's not surprising that he stayed. I thought Mike sounded much better last night than on Tuesday, too. You're right, they always do. Well...MOST of the time. There have been notable exceptions.

Kate - Thanks! I pledge to try to continue being entertaining. :) Did you ever find out if that WAS Stewart? I'm not sure why he would have been there, but you never know.

Steve - I'm sorry that I've contributed to your nuttiness. You have a point, but I guess I just don't believe when Seacrest said the results were in random order. If that were true, there's always a chance that the eliminated person would be announced first and they would never let that happen. How would they kill that whole hour if that were true? Also, for folks who participate in Idol pools (like me, who's in *@~&^$#& last place this year), there needs to be a Bottom 2.

Jules said...

Crystal needs to win. Period.

Steve said...

Hmmmm.....I guess if they had to fill more time on an hour long show they could...ummm....HEY! How about adding another musical number featuring a band (or artist) pimping a new record??!?!?!
Hope your bottom two works out better for you next week. I think that at least it should be an easier task.
Enjoy your week.

J. Hi said...

While fast forwarding through most of the results show I was fantasizing about when the results shows used to be 1/2 hour.

I thought you were right this time and Casey was going. I was very surprised.

Heff said...

Heff calls it AGAIN !!!!

Fantasia ??!?!? DAMN, I'm GLAD I missed last night's show....

Candy's daily Dandy said...

Ya know I completely forgot about elimination night last night. I woke up this morning and realized I had forgotten to watch.

is this an indication of things to come.

Cora said...

I hate AI this season. HATE. What the hell happened?

 

Who Does This Broad Think She Is?

My photo
I am a winsome muse who was sent to Earth to inspire an artist to turn a vacant building into the world's coolest disco roller rink. We fell in love along the way, and I foolishly gave up my immortality. When the disco craze ended and all the roller rinks were shut down, that lazy bum wouldn't get a job. We broke up and I was stuck on Earth with nothing to do and no one to inspire. So, now I write a blog.

What Do Others Think of BeckEye?

"You're like an idiot savant of terrible garbage entertainment." - Falwless

"You're my hero." - Candy

"Get yourself a life. Better yet.....eff off." - Ann Onymous

"There's no one like you." - Klaus Meine