Thursday, May 05, 2011

American Idol 10: 5/5/11 Results

Well folks, I can't even really do a good/bad/ugly-style results show recap, because it was all pretty bad. It's hard to rank filler.

I suppose J.Lo's performance was entertaining enough. My favorite part was when she said "on the floor." Then she gave us a sneak peek of her new single/video, "I'm Into You," which promises to be just as lyrically brilliant as her current hit.

Are we all done listening to Jimmy Iovine yet? He scored Jacob an "8" for last night but thought that Lauren would end up in the Bottom 2 simply because she missed an opportunity to blast a glory note into an otherwise perfectly fine performance of "Unchained Melody?" Turns out he was right—she was that weepy mess in the Bottom 2—but that still doesn't make him any less of an idiot. Especially since the great "8" was the one sent packing—an event he celebrated with an orgasmic array of shrieks at the conclusion of his sing out.

I hope you all took a big whiff and filled your nostrils with the last remnants of the Lusky Stank... before it vanishes on the wind forever.

Find more Idol news and recaps at SirLinksaLot.


Cora said...

Lauren took being in the bottom two soooooooo hard. She cried like Miley Cyrus just died. What's she going to do the day she gets voted off?!

Heff said...

That show's as fake as Bristol Palin's new chin !!!

elaine said...

Lauren's competing for votes with Haley (young females) and Scott (country sound), so I figured she would be in the bottom two since the others had such strong nights (even though I thought Lauren had a good night, too). Hopefully her brush with near elimination will motivate her fans to vote for her more.

Scope said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Scope said...

And now it gets tricky. I think right now, like Randy said, it's James's competion to lose.

And here's how he loses it.

Next to go:

Haley - She doesn't need to hit a homerun each time up from now on out to stay in, she has to hit a grand slam. And since she was in the pimp spot this week, she won't be there next week, so that doesn't happen. (I don't think she gets enough of Jacob's votes to save her.)

Followed by:
Scotty - James is still going strong, but Lauren gets a good chunk of Haley's old voters and that puts her over on Scotty.

So the Finals are James vs. Lauren. And Lauren picks up the "country" votes from Scotty. And she's from the south where more votes come from. And she's from the east coast, where we can vote 2 hours longer (until the lines close AFTER the west coast showing).

And Lauren really wants to be the "American IDOL" puppet. And, James doesn't want to do the CD that they are going to shove down his throat, and he takes the path of so many presumed favorites, and happily slides into the second position, smiling, twitching, and aping Ryan Seacrest behind his back.

But Cora and I haven't sat around putting TOO much thought into this. :-)

Coaster Punchman said...

I was quite glad to see him go. He was annoying. And the screeching at the end of that song made me think my cat was getting run over in the driveway.

Ann said...

first of all the chick who wrote this article clearly doesnt like country or good wholesome kids . she must like alot of screming and sexual content and bad hehavior she has no class . thats why your on the internet and we really dont know who you are . you idiot . im sure your not going to post this . you can dish it out but you cant take it . they are kids and you are trying to break them down . love you scotty and lauren. sure you wont aprove blogger

Ann said...

who are you to say whats good and bad a whats your name lets see Beckeye nope never heard of you . scotty yep everyone has heard of him ..shut your no writing ability mouth and crawl back under that rock you came from . probly wont allow this . scarred are ya

BeckEye said...

Oh, Ann. You've made my day! Of course I'd publish your comments. I love to let everyone see hilarious comments like yours. Unfortunately, no one will because you haven't figured out how to work the Internet (or grammar and punctuation, for that matter) and commented in a recap from weeks ago that has absolutely nothing to do with Scotty and Lauren. So, maybe I'll give you your own post. It's happened before.


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