Thursday, June 02, 2011

I must admit I can't explain any of these thoughts racing through my brain

Soooo...how was everyone's Memorial Day weekend? Mine was fab. I thought I would probably have all kinds of awesome NYC stories for you but they pretty much all go something like, "Blah blah blah, and then I drank about 34 beers." Just know that it was great to meet up with all my old New York friends (including my ex-roommates, now Chicagoans) and that I've spent the last several days screaming inside my head, HOLY SHIT WHY DID I EVER LEAVE THERE?? But whatever. I'm not moving again. Moving sucks. I can wait until 2012, when the big tidal wave brings NYC right to my doorstep.

Sadly, I did not get to see Lady Gaga's GMA performance on Friday because I didn't arrive in the city until late afternoon/early evening. I didn't even find out about it until Thursday night. Even if I had known in advance, I would never have let myself be crushed by a bunch of idiots at 6 a.m. Instead, I listened to Born This Way in its entirety several times on the drive up and back and sang the shit out of it. I've been hearing a lot of conflicting reviews on that album but I think it's great fun. My favorite tracks are "The Edge of Glory," "Scheiße" and "Bad Kids." "Marry the Night" is the best song that never made it onto the Streets of Fire soundtrack. And "Judas," which I hated at first, has finally won me over. The biggest disappointment is probably "You & I," a song I've always loved live. It's still a good tune and certainly singalong-friendly, but I'm not too happy with Mutt Lange's standard "Pour Some Sugar on Me 'Cause Honey I'm Home" treatment. And people accuse Gaga of being unoriginal! Sheesh. Speaking of which, I have no problem with the Lady wearing her '70s and '80s influences on her sleeve. But even though I've defended her against the Madonna ripoff allegations (honestly, people, "Born This Way" doesn't sound nearly as much like "Express Yourself" as "Express Yourself" sounds like "Respect Yourself"), I can't defend "Fashion of His Love," which is practically a carbon copy of Whitney Houston's "I Wanna Dance With Somebody." I have no idea what Gaga was thinking when she recorded that.

Some lovely commenters have suggested that I start recapping some other shows besides American Idol. While I appreciate that, if you're looking for some summer TV lovin' from me, it's probably not gonna happen. (But if Project Runway ever returns, look for my recaps over on Starpulse!) After losing months of my life to Idol, it always feels so good to be free. I suppose I could fire up the DVR but, because there's usually much more to do in the summer, I always forgot when shows are even on. Like, I kind of started getting into The Voice but I can never remember when it airs. Historically, I've loved So You Think You Can Dance, but I already missed this season's first couple episodes. I've never really been a fan of America's Got Talent, but I might give it a chance this time around. I won't be doing regular recaps or anything, but I might spew out some thoughts on it here and there. The premiere episode was rather entertaining but I have to express my disgust with the audience for booing Double Dream Hands guy off the stage. WHAT KIND OF PEOPLE WOULD BOO SUCH A VISIONARY?? Also, I have to express my disappointment that, during a totally spontaneous sword fight (that's not a euphemism for anything) between Piers Morgan and Howie Mandel, no one died or was severely maimed.

For those of you looking to trade in garbage TV for a garbage movie, here is a suggestion: Nature's Grave. On my first night back in NYC, my old Bad Movie Crew had the pleasure of screening this totally by accident. (One of our crew members thought he was buying a low-budget horror movie about birds from Blockbuster's bargain bin, only to find this disc hiding inside.) The lesson this classic film teaches us is that nature will totally kill you if you disrespect it, even in the smallest way. I will give the movie props for two things: the dog doesn't die and Jim Caviezel looks kind of hot (as long as his shirt's on) with frosted blonde tips. Also, it features one of the best line readings I've ever witnessed: grief-stricken Caviezel's "WHY YOU GO?" It really has to be seen/heard to be believed.

Apparently, Paul Rudd is filming a movie in Pittsburgh. I haven't seen him yet. Then again, I haven't gone looking for him. I must get on this. See, and you've been thinking all this time that his picture had nothing to do with this post. Even if it didn't, I don't need a reason to post a picture of that guy.

15 comments:

So. Cal. Gal said...

*sigh* You post a slobber-worthy pic of Paul Rudd then talk about the Gaga. When's the next flight to PA?

Brahm (alfred lives here) said...

I am agreeing in the Gaga album so far, on my first listen. Like don't live. Yet.

No excuses needed forva Paul Rudd photo!

Scope said...

Streets of Fire? Streets of Fire? Did you throw that reference in just for me?

Glad you had a wonderful weekend!

red said...

Dude, the Mutt Lange BGVs on You and I make me want to KMS.

words...words...words... said...

I can't believe you took Mutt Lange's name in vain!

Other than that, I'm glad you had fun :)

dguzman said...

If I don't have your summaries of crap tv to look forward to, life ain't worth livin', baby. So I'll take whatever scraps you throw out!

Travis Cody said...

I've caught 3 out of the 4 audition rounds so far for SYTYCD. Vegas rounds are next week, and then we'll have our Top 20. I shall begin reviews once the kids are dancing for votes.

It looks like we won't have any ballroom dancers in the Top 20, but there are a couple of street dancers I have my eye on. And of course contemporary will be well represented.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

That's a picture of Paul Rudd? I thought it was some random serial killer!

Billy said...

Tooootally agree on the Mutt Lange song. At least GaGa was theoretically ripping off someone else. Mutt is just recycling his own songs, and they've gone really stale.

I was kinda sad you didn't mention "Hair." Like the whole album, I simultaneously kinda enjoy it and also despise myself for enjoying it.

And there's only one AI. You could try doing it with other shows, but... AI is now something like a relative in your house, and you just seem to know her better than everyone else.

Candy's daily Dandy said...

Glad you went to get your NYC fix! So I wuz thinkin....

Me and you need to roll out on a road trip this summer (a la Oprah and Gayle) to Chicago and see Corascope.

It could be legendary....jus sayin.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

That is a damn sexy pic of Mr. Rudd. Another show to recap might be competitive eating shows. I like those. I want to see the competitive pooing afterwards.

cube said...

You went to NY during Fleet Week and you didn't have fun? I may have to stop living vicariously through you ;-)

BTW I'm a Gaga fan, but I don't think her recent stuff is as good as her older stuff. Maybe she should chill and think about the work a bit instead of the costumes. Just saying...

BeckEye said...

I think we can all agree that there should be some sort of reality show featuring Paul Rudd and Lady Gaga...and yours truly, of course.

Cube - Who said I didn't have any fun? I was just too drunk most of the time to give a very good account of what happened. :)

And most of the sailors I saw were nasty.

Dale said...

Ah New York! I miss visiting it! Maybe in the fall. I will have 34 beers in your honour. Isn't Paul Rudd tiny? Maybe you've walked by him or on him already?

bloody awful poetry said...

Next time, post more Paul Rudd pictures. Also, you must totally get out there and find him.

 

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