Sunday, February 24, 2008

Oscar Thoughts: Hour 2 and Beyond

* Josh Brolin and James McAvoy presented Joel and Ethan Coen with the Best Adapted Screenplay Oscar. Big deal. I'd just like to see more of Josh's face and hear more of James's accent.

* Travolta sighting #3 (in the "voting process video.") Goooood. But where did all that hair suddenly come from??

* Miley Cyrus got to be a presenter? Lisa Rinna might have some competition for that "Person Who Has No Reason for Being at the Oscars" award that I give out every year.

* Kristen Chenowith performed another nominated song from Enchanted, "How Does She Know." Gee, I liked this better the first time I heard it in The Little Mermaid, when it was called "Kiss the Girl."

* Jon Stewart announced that three ladies in the audience were pregnant: Jessica Alba, Cate Blanchett and Nicole Kidman. He then announced that, "The baby goes to...Angelina Jolie!" Then he said that Angelina couldn't be there because it was too hard to get 17 babysitters. Like "he's crazy" Tom Cruise jokes, "she has too many kids" jokes about Angelina never get old.

* Seth Rogen and his mini-me from Superbad stopped by to engage in some rather non-witty banter about which one of them got to be Halle Berry and which one had to be Dame Judi Dench. For as much as mini-Seth said he wanted to be Halle, he kept calling her "Holly."

* Forest Whitaker presented the Best Actress Oscar to Marion Cotillard for her portrayal of Edith Piaf in La Vie en Rose. She showed everyone how to french inhale, because the guys really go for it.

* Colin Farrell almost slipped on something and called for a clean-up on Stage 2. Then he introduced another nominated song, "Falling Slowly" from the Irish indie flick, Once. I keep hearing good things about this movie and I currenly have it in my Netflix queue. My anger over Eddie's snub dissipated slightly as this song unfolded because it was very pretty with nice lyrics. I immediately thought, "Sweet song from an indie movie - it has no chance to win."

* Renee Zellweger came straight from the Lemon Sucking Contest to present the Editing Oscar. I swear she must memorize her lines. Can't read cue cards if you have no eyes.

* Nicole Kidman presented the Honorary Oscar to 98 year-old production designer/art director, Robert Boyle. He actually looked pretty damn good for 98. That's Hollywood!

* Patrick Dempsey and his beautiful head of hair introduced yet another nominated song from Enchanted, "So Close." Who was that kid singing? He was like an American Idol reject. Kid, if you can't hit the high notes, don't try them! Especially not on live TV!

* TRAVOLTA! Finally, my man took the stage. He came out dancing with one of those princesses from the Enchanted number. He also slipped on whatever Colin Farrell did, so I guess the clean-up crew decided to go on strike. Either that or Jon Stewart is a heavy drooler. John presented the award for Best Original Song, and I was hoping that he would make me love him more (if that's even possible) by going on a tirade about Eddie's snub, but no such luck. To my astonishment, "Falling Slowly" actually won! Thank goodness. Glen Hansard, lead singer of The Frames, and Marketa Irglova were very gracious winners and it seemed like a lot of the audience had been pulling for them. (And that Glen sure had a nice Irish brogue.) After the "wrap it up" music cut Irglova off before she could say anything, Jon Stewart had her come back out onstage and she said a few nice words of encouragement to all of the indie artists out there, plugging away.

* Jon Stewart announced that there was a "Boeing 747 with its lights on," and John Travolta came running back out onstage. Cute. I'll kill anyone who says otherwise.

* Cameron Diaz showed up just to annoy me. Ah, she's so dependable.

* Hilary Swank intro'd the "In Memoriam" montage. Those things always bother me because it seems a little disrespectful when people clap for the people that they know, so it ends up that some people get a lot of applause and some people get none. It's almost like saying, "These people's lives were more important than these ones." I'm not an uber-sensitive person, but that's just how it always comes off to me. I feel like they should have silence during the montage, and then clap for everyone when it's over. But, whatever. Anyway, I knew Heath Ledger would be the last one they showed but....NO BRAD RENFRO??? What the hell?? That really pissed me off.

* Amy Adams presented the award for Best Original Score - a category that also had a notable snub. Apparently, Radiohead guitarist Jonny Greenwood's score for There Will Be Blood was disqualified from contention because "the majority of the music was not composed specifically for the film." Hmm, I wonder if my Canadian friend, Barbara, is also pissed at Oscar this year?

* No one can accuse Tom Hanks of having cosmetic surgery. Man, he's starting to look old!

* Helen Mirren presented the Best Actor Oscar to Daniel Day Lewis. Gee, no one saw that coming. I fliipped back to Rock of Love, so I have no idea how many "milkshake" jokes were made.

* Best Director and Picture went to Joel and Ethan Coen for No Country For Old Men.

* And is if it wasn't bad enough that Eddie was snubbed...why in the hell wasn't Will Ferrell there??

I'll be doling out the special Pop Eye awards tomorrow. For past categories and winners, see here and here.


The Guv'ner said...

Awesome! I didn't see even ten seconds of the Oscars but I don't feel I have to now. I don't even know yet who won - I'm happy about "No Country for Old Men" but still don't know who took the other categories. I suspect it wasn't JUNO... Of the nominated movies I don't think I'd seen many either. I did see Michael Clayton the other day and boy - old Clooney was excellent, and I'm not usually a huge fan of his. Tilda Swinton is one weird looking chick. I'm going to go find a winners list now and whine.

cube said...

The last one I watched the Oscars was the year of Silence of the Lambs. I lost interest after that.

I do enjoy reading your Oscar blog posts :-)

CDP said...

I thought the John Travolta airplane bit was cute, too. I also liked the part where Stewart and the little girl from August Rush were playing Wii.

Even my husband, who's clueless about pop culture, was all "Miley Cyrus? She must have a really good agent!" That, and she makes a LOT of money for the Disney company.

SkylersDad said...

Best moment of the night for me was Stewart bringing Irglova back on the stage to let her give her acceptance speech.

Well deserved and classy!

Writeprocrastinator said...

Do you remember Glen Hansard when he played guitar for this band? Of course his hair was a lot longer back then.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

I have a few questions about the Oscars:

1. Why can't someone buy Jennifer Hudson a decent bra?
2. Why did Diablo Cody wear her nightie to accept best original screenplay?
3. Why were all the songs such crap (except for the one that actually won - that was pretty)? Well at least we didn't have to witness Celine Dion warbling away in a backwards tuxedo.

And yes, Beckeye, Jonny Greenwood was robbed! Just because he threw a little Bach into his score. The bastards. At least he was nominated for a BAFTA, even if he didn't win.

Gifted Typist said...

Was thinking of you the minute John Travolta slipped
- more glad for you than him that he didn't fall. Phew!

pistols at dawn said...

I'm just happy the Coens won lots. I'm a simple man.

Still, no awards for Breakin' 2? What the hell, Academy?

Chancelucky said...

maybe Tom Hanks got plastic surgery to make himself look older.

Blowing Shit Up With Gas said...

What'd you think of Harrison Ford? He had a few minutes on screen last nite... Seems to have aged 20 years since I saw him last.

Barbara said...

I couldn't wait to get to your blog today, I knew it would be ten times more entertaining thatn the actual show! LOVED the comment on Renee what's her name, she BUGS!! as does Cameron Diaz (who obviously forgot to have her hair done for the event).

Thought of you when I saw John! (hair implants maybe?)

Dale said...

That clapping during the In Memoriam and any other montage for certain things always irks me too. Why wouldn't they have included Brad Renfro? That's so friggin' rotten.


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