Thursday, April 30, 2009

American Idol 8 Results: 4/29/09 (Part II: Adam Lambert is Love)

I still haven't seen any footage from last night's results show, so I'm going to have to skip the full-fledged recap this week. I know, it's sad. But look, I need a break from those Ford commercials anyway. And I don't think I could've suffered through a Jamie Foxx song. I can't take him seriously as a singer. Or an actor, for that matter. He'll always be Wanda to me. Heyyyyyy.

After reading Candy's (first-ever) recap, I discovered that the only interesting thing that happened last night was that Madame Glambert was in the Bottom 2. People went nuts over the injustice of it all. Well, people who still have faith that the producers of this show aren't lying to us every other minute...and I am not one of those people.

Much like I will never believe that my beloved Michael Johns (Season 7) received the lowest amount of votes the week he was eliminated, no one can convince me that Adam was actually put in the Bottom 2 by the public. This show may use viewer votes, but I think they're used more like a loose guide to get a feel for which Idols are the most popular. Then, the producers take that info and manipulate things the way they want them. It's all about ratings.

Making it look like the clear star of the season is in danger of being ousted is a brilliant strategy, really. Because, even though I love Adam dearly, this season was turning into a bit of a snoozefest. It reminds me of the MLB, and why I don't follow baseball anymore. The teams who have the money win. No one else can even compete. It's no fun to watch the Yankees or the Braves walk away with their divisions every year. (ETA: Or whatever teams are winning these days. It's been pointed out that my references are dated. I stopped following baseball in 1992, people, what do you expect?) Even if you're a fan of those teams, I have to imagine that it just gets boring at some point. Same with this season of Idol. The guy with all the experience and charm always gives the best performance. Others may do well, but no one can hold a candle to him. Every week, he is the one viewers can't wait to hear - even the viewers who may not like his "screaming" vocals. Because he's interesting. And, for this show, he's something new. Something special. He's the glue holding this season together.

But he's also the constant reminder of how mediocre everyone else is. (With the possible exception of Allison. But even though she's got the chops, she doesn't have Adam's it factor.) Putting him on the chopping block was necessary. AI desperately needed to inject some life into this season.

They also desperately need to eject Kara DioGuardi.

As it turned out, the only one ejected last night was Matt Giraud, as I predicted. They lanced him like a giant boil on a forehead. (Hint, hint.) Just in time, too because next week is...

ROCK AND ROLLLLL, MUTHAHUMPERS!!

The esteemed Mr. Saul Hudson will be mentoring the Idols, so I hope he talks Adam into singing "Sweet Child O' Mine." Actually, no. Scratch that. Even though that would be awesome, I'm hoping that he morphs into Adam GlamRock with a cover of T. Rex's "20th Century Boy."

It's kind of sad that the mere thought of that possible performance is more exciting to me than anything I've seen from anyone else this whole season.


Find more Idol news and recaps at SirLinksalot.

19 comments:

dguzman said...

So now even YOU aren't watching the show. And yet, I STILL prefer your non-recap recaps to actually watching it.

red said...

You can tell you stopped watching baseball years ago when Yankees and Braves winning their divisions is your go to reference.

Dave said...

I'd rather see/hear Adam cover "Welcome to the Jungle" than SCOM.

I'm just happy that Matt's third eye left along with him.

The Vegetable Assassin said...

AWE. SOME. No more Timberass.

Seriously though, how does Adam get in the bottom 2? How is that possible? The judges almost had a giant simultaneous orgasm over him that night. You're right though, something's amiss with that show. I never seem to agree with anything!

Candy's daily Dandy said...

thank you Becks for the shout out!
And yes, gullible is my middle name.

Fancy Schmancy said...

My, aren't we cynical? ;)

I'm hoping Adam pulls out some Freddy Mercury next week.

gizmorox said...

T. Rex on Idol would be freaking hilarious.

LiLu said...

Omg, that poor kid is on TELEVISION?! In front of millions of people?? And he looks like THAT???

I can't even hate. I just feel bad for him.

Red said...

Last MLB season, 3 out of the 4 teams in the LCSes were very close to the bottom of the payroll. AND THE PHILLIES WON! It was great.

words...words...words... said...

I agree with everything you said 100%. I'm going to be uncharacteristically quiet.

But I'd like to see Adam pull out some Queen (and NOT a ballad) or my longshot hope-that-will-never-happen, "In The Meantime" by Spacehog.

And I'm framing Red's last comment. I think it made me a little hot.

Dave said...

If Adam did a Queen song, I hope it's "I Want to Break Free" complete with the vacuum cleaner.

mike said...

I honestly have NEVER seen this show. So I guess I just wanted to leave a comment and say hi. But I am impressed with Red's baseball shit talking, so now I'm going to watch Idol to see if Red talks about baseball on your blog!

Ian said...

I hope you don't watch the NBA either, where your team has no chance of winning a championship unless they play in a big market or have a mega-hyped star. David Stern and his paid-off referees will make sure of it. I much prefer baseball. Ever since Billy Beane came along and mastered the art of winning with a small payroll, lots of lower-budget teams have contended. It's exciting to see which teams will win by making shrewd moves and knock off the big spenders.

Gifted Typist said...

My dvr protested this week and failed to produce. Maybe it was just editing me from boredom. To my mind Matt should have gone two weeks ago. Justice was served.

Bond said...

BASEBALL reference..even though, as has been pointed out, your analogy was off...

Adam and Allison..final two

Heff said...

Yes, I AM Republican, LOL !!!

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

T. Rex wasn't glam rock. They were cosmic rock.

cube said...

My kids and I call Matt "Yop Yop" because of the large wart-like object on his forehead. Yop Yop got the chop chop. Good riddance.

(Yop Yop is a reference you would only be familiar with if you've watched The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy. Yeah, when you have kids, you watch cartoons.)

Coaster Punchman said...

Holy smokes girl, I just about sh*t my pants laughing at your recap of Gokey's performance. I didn't get to see it on the TV so I YouTubed a few minutes of it - let's just say I'm glad I won't ever have to ask for those 5 minutes back.

 

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